It was Christmas Eve 1976 when I received Ted the Floppy Bear from Grandma Patti. I was 4 and distinctly remember his head popping up and me lifting him out of the gift box. It was luv at first sight. The timing of Ted coming into my life couldn’t have been better.
By Spring I was 5 and my parents divorced. My father abandoned me and all of his responsibilities as a father. On top of that, I was left alone with my mother who was mentally ill and then became addicted to prescription drugs and alcohol. She luved me the best she could but my childhood was filled with criticism, yelling, and a roller coaster of ups and downs with the twists and turns of her mood swings.
My consistent friend and supplier of endless luv was Ted. He was particularly special because he was given to me by Grandma Patti who luved me dearly and was always there for me, even if not physically nearby. Ted slept with me nightly, traveled on all my vacations and my first airplane rides by myself, comforted me when mom raged, got me through first crushes and broken hearts. From Ted I learned that it did not matter where luv comes from as long as you receive it. With Ted I became tenacious, never giving up, and resourceful in finding what I needed.
Along the way I adopted two moms - Barbara “Mum” and Morgan, and two dads - Papa Ray Ray and Claude. From them, Grandma Patti and Ted, I got what I needed that my parents could not provide. The source of luv is limitless and accessible at all times. Ted was a self-luv, a godly or more universal luv that I discovered. He got me through and I thrived.
When you feel unluved, luv is always there. It is just a matter of tapping into the source and remembering.
Thank you Grandma Patti, Barbara “Mum”, Morgan, Papa Ray Ray, and Claude for luving me.
Thank you Ted for always being there!
Luv you Ted! You so ROCX It!